Makes me wonder why.

you know, so many things have been playing around my head for quite some time now.

i need to release them somehow so that it'll be much easier to forget all the shyt.

i've learnt my lessons from previous incidents and i dont want to repeat them again.

.

have you ever felt like the people around you are the ones who will hurt you the most one day?

why do i feel like it's happening to me now?

maybe it was a long time ago, just that i never realised it.

but i'm much smarter now and i know what to expect from all of you.

.

i always thought i could handle things but everything is proving me wrong.

why did i even trust all of you?

why is it that when i do something, you want to ruin it?

was it my fault telling you?

i know people say that i should keep things to myself.

maybe i should have.

.

anyway, i dont want to look back on anything.

i'm taking this very positively.

this is the first time in my life you slapped me so hard, i will never forgive you.

just because we're close, i'm trying to forget everything.

will it be much better if i avoid or ignore you, should i just be normal?

i don't know, and im begging for answers.

.

and YOU, you think i dont know what you did?

you took my hp, read my messages, started your plan, ruined my hopes.

now it's done, are you happy?

i know if you read this, you'll know who you are.

and you should also know that i hate you for that.

come and tell me in my face what you plan to do if you're brave enough.

don't pretend in front of me, it wouldnt help you.

and dont think i'm gonna let you continue.

so i suggest you keep your shyt to yourself.

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i know who i can trust,

i know who are close to me but that's just not what i need,

i know who will always be there for me,

and SAVIRA, you're the only one who knows everything about me and im so proud to have you.

i also know who makes use of me,

and i know who's going to ruin me one day.

.

i know i shouldn't have put all my feelings into this,

i should have known that you're just the same,

now that you've hurt me so much, just leave me alone.

i've always been searching for answers, but i've given up.

i don't think i need all your shyt now.

thank you for showing me what i can expect from people next time.

i've learnt alot from your shyt and it might be a good thing.

.

anyone of you who reads this,

please please do not ask me anything.

because my answer will just be the same.

and some of you will come up with your own conclusions because you think you know everything about me.

well, do it then. it doesn't bother me anymore.

you go around spreading stories about me so that your plan will succeed.

you think i don't know?

well this is why i got a blog ryte.

so that YOU and I will know the truth.

.

things have been so painful,

i'm only seventeen but it feels like i've been through the worst in life already.

so now you can sit back and clap your hands if that's what you wanted.

i try my best to forget what you people did, but it aint easy.

because you are all close to me and it seemed so impossible to happen.

i know, ive been wrong about you people.

sorry if i was just too dumb.

i should have known from day one you would do this to me.

nvm, its done now. you win.

i just want to forget everything.